What is the One True Religion?

What is the One True Religion?

  • Church of the Onion!

    Votes: 38 63.3%

  • Church of the Onion?

    Votes: 22 36.7%
  • Total voters
    60

DeletedUser

Good. I hope they don't ask for anything. Save your money or if you really feel the need to give it away, do so to the charity of your choosing.

By the way, I thought you were 14. How do you know how much your folks stuff in the envelope every Sunday? Probably enough that in the past 14 years they could have set that money aside for a nice chunk of change for college for you. But alas, have faith in God. He will edumacate you and find you employment.

And yes, most people do want fries with that.
 

DeletedUser13682

I don't know about my parents, but I go to a different church then them.
 

DeletedUser13682

I own items. My parents don't own all my things. I do have 10% to give, I'm just not asked.
 

DeletedUser

I'm sure the church would love a game controller, the sole off one of your shoes, 3 pairs of dirty underwear and your Justin Timberlake CD. Praise Jebus!
 

DeletedUser13682

My church does not want any of that. My church earns their money by working.
 

DeletedUser

Are you Amish? The only church people I ever see out working together are the Amish.

Which by the way I have total respect for the Amish.
 

DeletedUser13682

No I am not Amish. I respect them, but I couldn't be Amish.
 

DeletedUser

Can I ask why you go to a different church than you folks? Is it a branch of their church but for the youth?
 

DeletedUser13682

I don't like my parent's church, so I go to a different one. It's not a branch, I consider that as the same church.
 

DeletedUser

Well Onion doesn't hate you for worshiping another god. Onion is very forgiving that way. As long as you don't worship garlic, spam, spaghetti, mayo or fish all is forgiven.
 

DeletedUser13682

i don't worship any of that. But how can an onion have feelings?
 

DeletedUser

If you cut an Onion do you not cry? Onion doesn't feel, Onion makes you feel.
 

DeletedUser13682

I personally do not cry when I cut onions. I've tried. I've gotten my eyes right next to an onion I just chopped and no tears. But forgiveness is a feeling and you said the onion forgives.
 

DeletedUser

Forgiveness is not a feeling.

for⋅give⋅ness

–noun 1. act of forgiving; state of being forgiven. 2. disposition or willingness to forgive.



So you have tried to worship Onion and have turned away from his awesomeness because you feel he forsake you. The fault does not lie with Onion if you do not feel.
 

DeletedUser13682

I have never tried to worship an onion and if you cannot have emotion than you cannot forgive.
 

DeletedUser

I grow tired of these games with you. Jesus can have you. As far as I'm concerned that is a + for our side.

By the way, are you Gizmo and JM's love child?
 
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