Apelatia
Well-Known Member
Maybe it's time for you to come over to the ONLY way in this world.
Maybe it's time for you to come over to the ONLY way in this world.
DeletedUser
Maybe it's time for you to wipe away the false spam that is clogging up your eye sockets so you may see the light of the Onion.
DeletedUser35174
The spam does not bring tears to your eyes like the onion does but instead brings courage to your heart and wisdom to your mind.
DeletedUser8950
The tears onion brings are joy to those who unravel its wisdom, but those who fail to grasp the mystery of the onions will not enjoy these tears as a blessing. The cutter will unleash tears of pain upon those who scorn the onion, a pox on ye!
...I'll post a teachings thing later, but they take too long, so after this 'un I might just do a "food for thought" thing every day. Maybe every few days, actually, depending on interest. Others are welcome to contribute, for we are all touched by the Onion's many layers.
DeletedUser8950
Precisely. Shrek followed the path of the Onion, and it led to great happiness in his life.
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Today's lesson is again clearing up a misconception. Many see the tears of the Onion as a negative thing, however they do not understand why these tears are shed. The Onions layers contain such concentrated doses of knowledge that they move those who receive it to tears. Those who are unfamiliar with the teachings of the Onion may be upset by these tears, however they are a positive thing, as they are how we can see the love of the onion has spread.
However, those who insult the Onion do so because they cannot understand the sense of bliss and fulfilment the many layers of the Onion bring. Henceforth, they are doomed to be plagued by malignant tears as long as the Onion is present, until they can come to an understanding of what the Onion teaches.
Through the slicing and dicing, the love of onion spreads.
The guilty shall weep, the mighty shall be nourished.
Onion be our guide. Amen. -John Rose 2:32
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Words of Wisdom:
Great. You got an opinion. I guess that makes you right then!-John Rose, 7:3
Great. You got an opinion. I guess that makes you right then!-John Rose, 7:3
Food for thought:
If an apple a day keeps the doctor away, what does an onion a day do?
------If an apple a day keeps the doctor away, what does an onion a day do?
Is there still a national onion appreciation day, btw?
Diggo11
Well-Known Member
Keep digging, an outer layer does not reveal the core… wait, onions don't have cores!You know you sound a lot like christians?
Of course, seek and ye shall find: http://forum.the-west.net/calendar.php?do=getinfo&e=76&c=1Is there still a national onion appreciation day, btw?
DeletedUser31931
Can Onion rid this thread of the blight of the non-existent pages?
DeletedUser8950
Nay, brother Zemelci, for this is a sign that the Onion's layers will never be fully unravelled. Though you may read to the end of the last page today, the thread will continue to enlighten without end. Truly, we are blessed by the Onion.
DeletedUser31931
I see, my blindness to Onion caused this confusion. Thank you brother Darknoon5 for unraveling the layers of Onion's wisdom and showing me the meaning of the blessed tears it brought.
DeletedUser8950
I am only showing you the knowledge Onion hath already implanted in you, thank not I but the Onion.
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Words of wisdom
All are equal unto to the Onion, no matter where they where born, to what family they were born, their riches, their family.
In all things we are equal when we have seen the Glory of the Onion.
Still there are those whom would walk in blindness willingly, shying away from the light.
-John Rose 2:15
They see the teaching of the Onion, yet they remain blind.
They are offered understanding, yet they prefer ignorance.
What is one to do with such whom are adamant about staying deaf, blind, and ignorant?
-John Rose 14:9
All are equal unto to the Onion, no matter where they where born, to what family they were born, their riches, their family.
In all things we are equal when we have seen the Glory of the Onion.
Still there are those whom would walk in blindness willingly, shying away from the light.
-John Rose 2:15
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They are told about the Onion, yet they do not listen.Food for thought
They see the teaching of the Onion, yet they remain blind.
They are offered understanding, yet they prefer ignorance.
What is one to do with such whom are adamant about staying deaf, blind, and ignorant?
-John Rose 14:9
Apelatia
Well-Known Member
I am only showing you the knowledge Onion hath already implanted in you, thank not I but the Onion.
We all know that you are really trying to bring yourself glory and honour by pretending to be an onion.
Diggo11
Well-Known Member
My friend, you are so misguided. One does not pretend to be an onion, one embraces the Onion's infinite layers so that they may gain wisdom and live a happy, fulfilling life. What does spam bring to people? Nothing! (Lol, irony.) Spam and trolls bring nothing but pain and suffering to most, a fine ambition of yours indeed.
DeletedUser22685
DeletedUser8950
Onion and spam
Then the prophet addressed the foolish Spammer. "Your petty opinion has been noted and discarded. As usual it is a shining example of your misguided and ignorant ways." The spammer then fled in the face of the Onion's logic, for his arguments were as flawed and worthless as a slice of spam. -John Rose 30:6-7
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The Onion has little concern for the opinions of spammers, for one of the Onions commandments was "Thou shalleth not spam". However as the Onion is not one for rules it is happy for you to spam, so long as it is for the purpose of entertainment and goodwill, unlike Bk who spams to boost his post count. -Diggo 2:13
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Parable of the week
1 On the twelfth day ofAugust, the young Onionite Rawdog entered into the church seeking counsel on the nature of reputation, asking: "is green spam like premature onion?" 2 Brother Darknoon was in the church, and he then saw that Rawdog had not yet learnt the truth of the Onion. 3 "The Onion doth not support such ill-considered actions, for this leads to a path of ignorance." 4 Rawdog then wanted rid of this affliction, but he then realised the spammers of red rep had sent fear into his soul.5 He thus approached The Prophet himself, who spoke of the Oniontocray of reputation, for only posts of knowledged must be granted the green blessings of the Onion. 6 Rawdog thence asked "is there no way to stop them?" 7 "There is no stopping what must be done," replied The Prophet.
"Whence the green spam doth end, so will the red spam that grants balance.
Spamming green is a foolish action, for it will only cause more red spammers."
- 1 Onionites, 7: 1-7
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The moral is that just as rep-spamming bad posts will lead to many bad posters, praising stupidity will lead to many who are stupid. Only through uncovering the layers of the Onion can they learn.
(that took far too long to write)
Then the prophet addressed the foolish Spammer. "Your petty opinion has been noted and discarded. As usual it is a shining example of your misguided and ignorant ways." The spammer then fled in the face of the Onion's logic, for his arguments were as flawed and worthless as a slice of spam. -John Rose 30:6-7
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The Onion has little concern for the opinions of spammers, for one of the Onions commandments was "Thou shalleth not spam". However as the Onion is not one for rules it is happy for you to spam, so long as it is for the purpose of entertainment and goodwill, unlike Bk who spams to boost his post count. -Diggo 2:13
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Parable of the week
1 On the twelfth day ofAugust, the young Onionite Rawdog entered into the church seeking counsel on the nature of reputation, asking: "is green spam like premature onion?" 2 Brother Darknoon was in the church, and he then saw that Rawdog had not yet learnt the truth of the Onion. 3 "The Onion doth not support such ill-considered actions, for this leads to a path of ignorance." 4 Rawdog then wanted rid of this affliction, but he then realised the spammers of red rep had sent fear into his soul.5 He thus approached The Prophet himself, who spoke of the Oniontocray of reputation, for only posts of knowledged must be granted the green blessings of the Onion. 6 Rawdog thence asked "is there no way to stop them?" 7 "There is no stopping what must be done," replied The Prophet.
"Whence the green spam doth end, so will the red spam that grants balance.
Spamming green is a foolish action, for it will only cause more red spammers."
- 1 Onionites, 7: 1-7
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The moral is that just as rep-spamming bad posts will lead to many bad posters, praising stupidity will lead to many who are stupid. Only through uncovering the layers of the Onion can they learn.
(that took far too long to write)
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Diggo11
Well-Known Member
The Onion is uniquely rich in meaning, it is true, however it is a meaning you must discover for yourself. Take a journey through this thread: "Seek and ye shall find – Onion helps those who help themselves." — St Elmyr