Church of The Onion

nashy19

Nashy (as himself)
33ontd3.jpg
 

DeletedUser8950

Words of Wisom
Thou shal eat chocolate, so sayeth the Great Onion Himself!

Thou shalt indulge and enjoy thyself. For life is pleasure, and there is none but this one.
-John Rose 8:12-13
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Food for thought
“It's not worth doing something unless you were doing
something that someone, somewere, would much rather you weren't doing.”
 

DeletedUser

Onion and spam
Then the prophet addressed the foolish Spammer. "Your petty opinion has been noted and discarded. As usual it is a shining example of your misguided and ignorant ways.
" The spammer then fled in the face of the Onion's logic, for his arguments were as flawed and worthless as a slice of spam. -John Rose 30:6-7
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The Onion has little concern for the opinions of spammers, for one of the Onions commandments was "Thou shalleth not spam". However as the Onion is not one for rules it is happy for you to spam, so long as it is for the purpose of entertainment and goodwill, unlike Bk who spams to boost his post count. -Diggo 2:13
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Parable of the week
1 On the twelfth day ofAugust, the young Onionite Rawdog entered into the church seeking counsel on the nature of reputation, asking: "is green spam like premature onion?" 2 Brother Darknoon was in the church, and he then saw that Rawdog had not yet learnt the truth of the Onion. 3 "The Onion doth not support such ill-considered actions, for this leads to a path of ignorance." 4 Rawdog then wanted rid of this affliction, but he then realised the spammers of red rep had sent fear into his soul.5 He thus approached The Prophet himself, who spoke of the Oniontocray of reputation, for only posts of knowledged must be granted the green blessings of the Onion. 6 Rawdog thence asked "is there no way to stop them?" 7 "There is no stopping what must be done," replied The Prophet.
"Whence the green spam doth end, so will the red spam that grants balance.
Spamming green is a foolish action, for it will only cause more red spammers."

- 1 Onionites, 7: 1-7
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The moral is that just as rep-spamming bad posts will lead to many bad posters, praising stupidity will lead to many who are stupid. Only through uncovering the layers of the Onion can they learn.

(that took far too long to write)

Whoa, this was from forever ago.
 

DeletedUser31931

The Onion is everlasting my child, you must seek the Onion and be accepted back into the light of the Holy Onion. Though you may have left and disobeyed the Onion, Onion is forgiving and he will let you return to the flock. Remember the Onion, and join again and stand a proud member of Onion.
 

DeletedUser8950

My friends, let us not forsake this thread! Keep the love of the Onion alive.
 

DeletedUser31931

I would have posted to help renew the Onion's greatness, but I could not disobey the rules of the Onion and double post. Can Onion forgive me?
 

DeletedUser8950

Onion forgives all, for he is not a petty God. Take comfort, for everybody falters on the path to true knowledge.
 

DeletedUser

PS4, because Microsoft is getting all Apple-y on how you can use their products.

Apple's mission statement: "Screw you, we're Apple."
 

DeletedUser

Agreed on the PC. A console is just a toy for playing games, whereas a PC is a TOOL....for playing games.
 

DeletedUser

You can build a pretty decent peice of hard ware in a desk top for around $600
 

DeletedUser31931

All Praise the Onion

Today we show a picture of a boy praying to receive his daily insight from Onion.

worship-the-onion.jpg


Remember that there are those among us who are less fortunate than ourselves, especially those who have been led away from the Holy Onion and onto the cruel path of Spam.
 
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