Why So Serious?

[DeletedUser]

Lord Regal's gonna hate me for this...
I've noticed that all the RPs on here are the serious, dramatic type, which I guess is how RPs are supposed to be.

My fellow RPists, I'm sure we have our vices. Why not kick back a bit, and have a little fun?

But why, you ask, did I not post this in Off Topic?
Simple: This is meant to be a more significant affair than that. Here, we can have more developed characters,
more thoughtful (albeit nonsensical) posts, therefore, the project as a whole will be more interesting.

As for the RP itself, I don't want to spoil it with such rigid confines as setting and plot so early, so we'll make it up as we go.
As for characters, let's start with this:
Name:
Age:
Species:
IQ:
Favorite Color:
Skills:
Homsar: (yes or no or whatever)
Opinion on Cardboard:
Weapons:
Clothing:

And anything else you would like to add.

As for rules:

This is the first (and quite likely last) time I will tolerate godmodding. Go
ahead and give yourself superpowers, as long as it doesn't wreck the comedic element.

Other than that, just obey the forum rules, and remember the words of Obi-Wan Kenobi:
"You were supposed to destroy the Sith, not join them! Bring balance to the
Force, not leave it in darkness. You were my brother, Anakin."

__________________________________
Name: Ludwig van Beethoven
Age: 239
Species: Loxodonta africana
IQ: -14
Favorite Color: Purple
Skills: Pants on the ground! Pants on the ground!
Homsar: Yes indeed
Opinion on Cardboard: NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN!!!!!!!!!!
Weapons: If it goes boom, slash or plink, I use it
Clothing: Preferably nothing

 

[DeletedUser]

Name: Elliot
Age: 28
Species: Human
IQ: Average
Favorite Color: Blue
Skills: Singer
Homsar: Hmmmmm....
Opinion on Cardboard: It belongs where it is.
Weapons: None
Clothing: Black suit jacket, White dress shirt, Black dress pants and Black dress shoes.

=======+=======+=======+

Elliot looked over at his brother, who was steering the car around a sharp bend in the road "What is this?"

"What's what?" David replied, glancing over

Elliot looked indignite "This CAR! This damned car!"

"It was a steal." David replied, shrugging his shoulders.

"What happened to the Cadillac? The Caddy!" Elliot replied, as he breathed in the free air.

"I traded it." David flipped the turn signal on, as the car sped towards a red light. David jumped a lawn filled with garden gnomes, dead gnomes flew everywhere and pelted an old couple sitting on the porch of the house.

The old woman reached under the pillow she was sitting on and withdrew a twelve gauge shotgun. She fired both barrels at the back of the Ford Taurus. The bumper was peppered with shrapnal, but nothing was damaged other then that.

"What did you trade the Cadillac for!?!" Elliot yelled at hsi brother.

"A Microphone."

"A Microphone! A MICROPHONE!?!" Elliot glared at his brother, before saying "Alright, I can see that."

 

[DeletedUser]

"911 emergency." The operator on the other end said "What's your emergency?"

"Yeah, Hi. My brother just tried to force a microphone down his throat, who do you send out for that?"

 

[DeletedUser14280]

Name: Dave Duet, the Barry Storm Specialist.
Age: 23
Species: Human.
IQ: OVER 9000!!! Actually 112.
Favorite Color: Purple.
Skills: Barry Stone, also bad singing.
Homsar: Boogie woogie!
Opinion on Cardboard: Neat to tromp on.
Weapons: Bad singing.
Clothing: Monkey suit (not literally).

VRROOM!
A big black limo pulled into the driveway at amazing speed, and a second later, a man leaped out.
"No need to fear, Super Dave is here!" he announced.

*chirping crickets*

Dave deflated and ran over to Barry.
"Okay, so this is Barry? Right, right. I know what to do."
He ran back to the car and picked out a fishing rod.
"Wait," he muttered; pulling a hand grenade out of the back seat, he pulled the pin out and threw the grenade away.

*BOOM!!!*

"Okay, ready!" he announced; fishing rod in one hand and pin from the grenade in the other.

(Too unserious?)

 

[DeletedUser]

Elliot looked over at David "Thanks a lot, David. The day I get out of the joint. We have to call the cops to get our brother's teeth off a microphone you traded for a CADILLAC!"

Elliot slapped David across the face "Idiot!"

 

[DeletedUser]

From under Davids arm, Elliot could see his idiot brother doing acrobatics on the lawn "Why didn't you put him in the asaylum like you were supposed to!?! That was the deal!"

 

[DeletedUser]

Elliot shook his head in despair, as his brother sat him on the ground. He was calmed down now and both brothers were once again wearing the same suit "So, now what? How do we get rid of him?"

David looked around "We can always move to Mexico."

 

[DeletedUser]

Beethoven lead his followers into Mexico City.

"Gentlemen, I have good news and bad news", he said.
"The good news is that Betsy can't touch us here. The bad news is
that Lord Regal can. So try not to violate any laws of the universe, OK?"

At that moment, Lord Regal entered the room. Beethoven soon realized that the figure
approaching him was really God in a Lord Regal costume. God, with his cover blown,
sadly retreated, and went back to doing whatever God does all day.

 

[DeletedUser]

Name: Chauncey
Age: 12
Species: Buffalo
IQ: 347
Favorite Color: Green
Skills: Walking and talking like a human
Homsar: ?
Opinion on Cardboard: While supposedly dull and brown, if analyzed closely, cardboard can actually have a rather intriguing air to it
Weapons: My sharp wit
Clothing: A waistcoat

------------------------------

Seeing that his hometown of Mexico City was being invaded, Chauncey stopped playing blackjack with the nearby gnome, and went over to counterattack the strangers. He pulled his wit out of its holder and confronted the invaders.

"It appears that whoever took the cookies from the cookie jar has returned to claim their wrongful place on the throne of destiny, wot?" Chauncey responded elusively.

 

[DeletedUser]

Beethoven then noticed a 12-year old buffalo trying to thwart invaders, and
decided that said buffalo needed a good song to help him along. So he started singing:

Vrei sa pleci dar nu ma, nu ma iei,
Nu ma, nu ma iei, nu ma, nu ma, nu ma iei
Chipul tau si dragostea din tei,
Mi-amintesc de ochii tai

At that point, he realized that Dragostea Din Tei, despite being one of the
greatest songs known to man, was an internet meme. So he decided to try
another O-Zone song:

Ma innec in ochii tai,
La la la la lei,
Plinge lumia dupa iei,
La la la la lei,
Iesti un inger pa pamint,
Despre tine cint,
Si zi si noapte,
La la lei

That didn't work either. At that point he had a thought:
"If O-Zone is Moldovan, how coma all their songs are in Romanian?"
Then Portugal exploded for no reason.

 

[DeletedUser]

After hearing the songs, Chauncey went into a huge fit of rage! Using his ability to stop time, in his anger, he went over to Portugal and exploded it. Felleing rather shamed after doing this, he went back to mexico and unstopped time. He remembered that the songs he heard were a different tongue, so he said

"If banana pox does not make one turn yellow, then if one was to return a gift to their favorite drugstore, would he or it or she not become the president of London?"

Feeling quite redeemed from his previous encounter, Chauncey went to Peru and temporarily changed his name to Rebecca. He soon grew tired of this name, and instead rented a cat for his best friend's cousin's uncle's nephew's cousin's best friend to love and care for forever and ever.

 

[DeletedUser]

Beethoven heard Rebecca's question, and came up with an answer:

"Yes and no. He or it or she becomes not the president of London, but a bowl of
Brunswick stew, with little or no money down, even in the corners."

In celebration, he got naked, dyed his body emerald green with harvest gold pinstripes,
and streaked through Mexico City screaming: "Coup de grace! Coup de grace!"

 

[DeletedUser]

The recently named Chauncey found this behavior quite disrespectful to his home, so he took a pie of tea and slammed it into the face of a traveling flamingo. He then shouted at Beethoven,

"That'll teach you for being to nice to the average ordinary yellow canary!"

Feeling quite victorious, Chauncey went out and ate another turkey, but not until he made a secret oath to himself that he might want to hire an assassin for Barry, his long lost enemy.

 

[DeletedUser]

"Don't challenge my nudity!", Beethoven rebutted, continuing to ensure that the residents
of Mexico City were scarred for life by the sight of his emerald and gold genitals.

He continued his stroll across the city clad in his birthday suit, making sure to recite
Hanukkah carols along the way. He soon realized that Hanukkah carols did not actually
exist, so he wrote a few on the spot. Alas, he knew absolutely nothing about Hanukkah,
so most of them went something like this:

A special day comes every year
I'm chewing on a *******'s ear
My uncle drinks a lot of beer
This ******* kind of tastes like deer
And it's Hanukkah!

Then we do something with candles
Proper frying pans have handles
Shoes are better than sandals
I'm out of words that rhyme with candles
AND IT"S HANUKKAH!!!

Regardless of their observance of Hanukkah or the sight of Beethoven sky-clad,
most passersby were deeply offended.

 

[DeletedUser]

Deciding that Hanukkah carols were a smashing idea, Chauncey decided to join

My favorite day comes once again
The camel's making quite a din
I turn around and make it spin
Then it starts to grow a fin
And it's Hanukkah!

We hope to try to capture the flame
In the very same name game
The moose discovers that he is lame
And the apple is rather tame
And it's Hanukkah